I think this one speaks for itself.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Black Swan
LaLa and ReeRee doing their rendition of... well... I'm really not quite sure to be honest with you!
Definition: Promenade
Prom-e-nade: a. A leisurely walk, especially one taken in a public place as a social activity. b. A public place for such walking.
Welcome to ReeRee's ever expanding vocabulary. Standing in the dining room this afternoon, waiting for the doors to open, ReeRee was having a conversation with CeeCee about a town in Maryland. Raving about it, she said that it was such a gorgeous town. There were boats everywhere and even a pommerod. Wait, a what?
CeeCee stopped her and said 'You mean a promenade?'.
'Huh? Oh... is that that thing you walk on? Then yeah, that's what I mean.'
Why does she even try to speak eloquently? It does not work well for her! Yet she won't stop! I understand that I am not the most well-versed person... so I don't try to be! I speak within my limits and don't make an ass out of myself because I think that I'll look smarter in the process. My theory is this: if you want to use those big words, get an effing dictionary and make sure that you're pronouncing them the way that they should be pronounced before you try to use them in a conversation! Also, and this is key, make sure you know what those words mean. For the sake of everyone's sanity around you, make sure that you know what that large ass word (or even, in her case, some very simple words) means.
It's ok though. There is a God and he is shining his wonderful light on The Club. On Friday, ReeRee gave her two weeks notice! Hot damn! B Man was toying with the idea of letting her know that her notice was going to be effective immediately. Then he was toying with the idea of paying her for two weeks to not come back. Then he decided that that is exactly what she would be hoping for and that he would do neither of those two things and she would remain until May 1st. As much as I would love (and I do mean LOVE) to see her gone ASAP, I agree with him 100%. He told me that the only reason she is still an employee of The Club and was not fired years ago is because he would not give her the satisfaction of firing her and giving her the ability to collect unemployment.
There are days when I adore that man!
Welcome to ReeRee's ever expanding vocabulary. Standing in the dining room this afternoon, waiting for the doors to open, ReeRee was having a conversation with CeeCee about a town in Maryland. Raving about it, she said that it was such a gorgeous town. There were boats everywhere and even a pommerod. Wait, a what?
CeeCee stopped her and said 'You mean a promenade?'.
'Huh? Oh... is that that thing you walk on? Then yeah, that's what I mean.'
Why does she even try to speak eloquently? It does not work well for her! Yet she won't stop! I understand that I am not the most well-versed person... so I don't try to be! I speak within my limits and don't make an ass out of myself because I think that I'll look smarter in the process. My theory is this: if you want to use those big words, get an effing dictionary and make sure that you're pronouncing them the way that they should be pronounced before you try to use them in a conversation! Also, and this is key, make sure you know what those words mean. For the sake of everyone's sanity around you, make sure that you know what that large ass word (or even, in her case, some very simple words) means.
It's ok though. There is a God and he is shining his wonderful light on The Club. On Friday, ReeRee gave her two weeks notice! Hot damn! B Man was toying with the idea of letting her know that her notice was going to be effective immediately. Then he was toying with the idea of paying her for two weeks to not come back. Then he decided that that is exactly what she would be hoping for and that he would do neither of those two things and she would remain until May 1st. As much as I would love (and I do mean LOVE) to see her gone ASAP, I agree with him 100%. He told me that the only reason she is still an employee of The Club and was not fired years ago is because he would not give her the satisfaction of firing her and giving her the ability to collect unemployment.
There are days when I adore that man!
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Talladega Nights
Sweet baby Jesus! ReeRee found a buyer for her house! I cannot tell you how excited I was to hear her saying that she needs to find a job down at the beach (where her trailer that she's moving in to when she sells her house is, which is much too far away for a commute to this city) asap. My elation was short lived. I then learned that all she's waiting for now is for the buyer to sell their current house. Damn, this could take awhile. ReeRee has been trying to sell her house for over a year and some poor sap has finally agreed to her astronomical asking price. With the housing market the way that it is right now, it could be another year before her miserable ass is out of The Club's door for good. And everyone but CeeCee is counting down the days.
I mentioned before that there was an incident of maturity on her part a few months ago that caused her to de-friend me on Facebook. Going back to that, here's the whole story for your reading enjoyment.
There was a small party in an upstairs dining room. During cocktails, ReeRee, in a tizzy, came into the kitchen to tell Just Jack, the bartender, that someone needed another drink. Just Jack asked who the person was so he would know what to make. What followed from ReeRee's mouth was a combination of words and gibberish that sounded something like a description of a female. Just Jack gave her a blank stare. ReeRee started to get agitated and repeated over and over "you know who I'm talking about. Just make her drink." and then stormed off to serve food. If it were Just Jack and I, we would have laughed it off and continued on with the night. In a stroke of bad luck for ReeRee, Mr. P was also standing there. He turned to us and said "is she always that rude?" Without skipping a beat, we both exclaimed "yup!" the following day she was taken off of working nights for atleast 6 weeks. And I was de-friended. I'm not losing sleep over it.
I mentioned before that there was an incident of maturity on her part a few months ago that caused her to de-friend me on Facebook. Going back to that, here's the whole story for your reading enjoyment.
There was a small party in an upstairs dining room. During cocktails, ReeRee, in a tizzy, came into the kitchen to tell Just Jack, the bartender, that someone needed another drink. Just Jack asked who the person was so he would know what to make. What followed from ReeRee's mouth was a combination of words and gibberish that sounded something like a description of a female. Just Jack gave her a blank stare. ReeRee started to get agitated and repeated over and over "you know who I'm talking about. Just make her drink." and then stormed off to serve food. If it were Just Jack and I, we would have laughed it off and continued on with the night. In a stroke of bad luck for ReeRee, Mr. P was also standing there. He turned to us and said "is she always that rude?" Without skipping a beat, we both exclaimed "yup!" the following day she was taken off of working nights for atleast 6 weeks. And I was de-friended. I'm not losing sleep over it.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
When Life Gives You Lemons...
ReeRee is at it again! For some reason, telling this woman that she makes horrible lemonade is grounds for immediate dismissal from her ever revolving mental Rolodex. A few weeks back, DeeDee observed ReeRee making lemonade for the dining room that she thought would be too sour. So DeeDee spoke up and said that she would suggest putting a little less lemon juice in. Well, you would have thought that she suggest ReeRee donate her first born to science! Since that day, ReeRee has not spoken to DeeDee unless she absolutely needed to. (Prior to The Lemonade Incident, as I've come to call it, ReeRee and DeeDee were becoming inseparable. Much to my dismay, but that's to be saved for another post.) ReeRee has now made it her personal vendetta to be as rude to DeeDee as possible. All because of some lemonade. Yeah, she has her priorities in order...
Fast forward to Friday, April Fool's Day. The employees at The Club love practical jokes. For the 7 yrs that I've worked here, many many jokes have been played and everyone knows they're coming and appreciates them. Except ReeRee because she's miserable.
LaLa had a great idea. Tell ReeRee that DeeDee bumped her for a party on Saturday and DeeDee will be working in ReeRee's place. I advised LaLa against it. That's like standing in a lion's den with a dead antelope strapped to you. You're going to get attacked. She agreed with me and thought of another joke to play on her. That was the last that I had heard of it until Saturday morning. Whether it was LaLa or someone else, ReeRee was told that DeeDee was working and not her. I started joking around with the B Man (my immediate boss) and had mentioned what LaLa thought was such a great idea the previous day. B Man proceeded to tell me that someone had, in fact, told ReeRee this which had resulted in her tracking down the B Man demanding to know why she 'has to fight for her paycheck around here.' B Man asked her what the hell she was talking about and she relayed the message about DeeDee. B Man gave her a blank stare for a few seconds and then replied with 'DeeDee isn't working tomorrow. And neither are you.'
Now in any normal situation in any normal world, the accuser would immediately retract their statement and apologize. You've never met ReeRee. She simply looked at B Man, turned to walk away and mumbled something along the lines of 'it must be an April Fool's joke.' Ya think?!
P.S. According to the ReeRee Dictionary, assinuate is a word meaning to 'introduce or insert oneself in a subtle manner.'
P.P.S. This is not ReeRee's first run in with someone who has hated on her lemonade. A few months back Mr. P (head honcho) asked who made the lemonade that day. When she fessed up, he told her that she needs to try it again because if he were at an establishment that served lemonade like that he'd send it back and order something else. She doesn't like Mr. P either...
Fast forward to Friday, April Fool's Day. The employees at The Club love practical jokes. For the 7 yrs that I've worked here, many many jokes have been played and everyone knows they're coming and appreciates them. Except ReeRee because she's miserable.
LaLa had a great idea. Tell ReeRee that DeeDee bumped her for a party on Saturday and DeeDee will be working in ReeRee's place. I advised LaLa against it. That's like standing in a lion's den with a dead antelope strapped to you. You're going to get attacked. She agreed with me and thought of another joke to play on her. That was the last that I had heard of it until Saturday morning. Whether it was LaLa or someone else, ReeRee was told that DeeDee was working and not her. I started joking around with the B Man (my immediate boss) and had mentioned what LaLa thought was such a great idea the previous day. B Man proceeded to tell me that someone had, in fact, told ReeRee this which had resulted in her tracking down the B Man demanding to know why she 'has to fight for her paycheck around here.' B Man asked her what the hell she was talking about and she relayed the message about DeeDee. B Man gave her a blank stare for a few seconds and then replied with 'DeeDee isn't working tomorrow. And neither are you.'
Now in any normal situation in any normal world, the accuser would immediately retract their statement and apologize. You've never met ReeRee. She simply looked at B Man, turned to walk away and mumbled something along the lines of 'it must be an April Fool's joke.' Ya think?!
P.S. According to the ReeRee Dictionary, assinuate is a word meaning to 'introduce or insert oneself in a subtle manner.'
P.P.S. This is not ReeRee's first run in with someone who has hated on her lemonade. A few months back Mr. P (head honcho) asked who made the lemonade that day. When she fessed up, he told her that she needs to try it again because if he were at an establishment that served lemonade like that he'd send it back and order something else. She doesn't like Mr. P either...
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